Monday, May 10, 2010

This is Me - Part 2

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13

This is one of those scriptures that I can personally tell you is true. Just about everyday I call upon Jesus to help me get through. Some days I need help to push through the pain or the fatigue, other days it might be to get me through the daily stress that comes with having a family. Trust me, if you stop and pray to our Father for help, He WILL hear you and answer you. It is the only way to explain how I get through most days. Believe isn't on my own.

Back when I was a "lukewarm" Christian, I knew this verse but didn't apply it to my life. I was self-sufficient and things were good. My prayer life was good but I had stopped going to church and I wasn't reading the Bible like I used to. I thought I was too busy (and I left the church I grew up in for other reasons I will explain later). Too busy......too busy for the Creator who gave me life. My heart breaks with guilt thinking about how casually I treated Him. Being sick started my journey back to Him. I prayed more. And did a lot of reflecting on things I had been taught in church growing up. One of the biggest things that helped me was remembering my old pastor talk about the massive heart attack he had. He said he never asked "Why Me?!?"......instead he said "Why Not Me".  I borrowed and held tight to that.
Yes I am facing a future of pain, pills and uncertainty.....and as much as I don't feel I "deserve" these diseases, I also know that I don't "deserve" to be healthy. People don't get sick because of something they did or didn't do. They aren't healthy because they are good or bad either. And as much as illnesses are cruel and horrible, I know that God can use them for good. Bad things happen, we can't avoid it. It is up to us to decide what to do after those bad things happen. When it happened to me, I turned back to God.

To be continued....

God Bless! Denise


Rochelle said...

Great new blog! I look forward to reading it more. Don't worry, keep writing...people will come. :)